What To Do When People Insult You?
Today,I would like to share with you some secrets on how to handle and deflect verbal attacks...
Before I start,I want to wish you a happy new year.2007,it's the year of new beginnings.Hope that you have a wonderful year ahead.
Let's start now...
Have you ever been in this situation?...Someone that you didn't offend keeps trying to run you down with verbal attacks?You were the nice guy,you kept quiet and let the other person "slash" you verbally.
Probably you were at a loss of what to say?Or you were not sure whether you should talk back?Because that person that "attacked" you was someone of higher authority.
I don't know if you were through the same thing as me...But when I was younger,I used to experience a lot of insults from my relatives.Those 2nd aunt,third uncles....you know what I mean...especially during family gatherings.That's why I hated family gatherings.
Now,my usual approach was to keep quiet and not talk back.After all,as asians,our parents taught us that we must respect our elders.I beg to differ from that.My rule is this "RESPECT YOUR ELDERS ONLY IF THEY DESERVED TO BE RESPECTED!"
I may sound arrogant.But that's me.I believe that just by being our elders don't give them the right to be insulting towards us.Especially if we didn't do anything wrong or anything bad towards them.
You may or may not agree with me.But that's fine.
I got very tired of these nonsense.It happends everytime at gatherings.Best part is my parents join in sometimes.I used to go home feeling very hurt and frustrated.I felt helpless...
WHY?WHY MUST I KEEP GETTING "BULLIED"?CAN'T I STAND UP FOR MYSELF?
AT LAST...I got fed up with all these nonsense.I was determined to give these bastards a taste of their own medicine...
I figured out why I was at a loss when they insulted me.Few reasons...
1.I was not prepared.I didn't expect them to insult me.When it happends,my mind was blank,I was not able to respond to them.
2.Fear.Fear of being labelled as a "bad boy" with no manners.Dare not offend those idiotic elders.
3.Lack of experience.Don't know how to be sarcastic back.
Let me share with you how I overcame those 3 problems...
1.I realised that these bastards have a tendency to like to be insulting.So I prepare myself before every gathering.If they try to be funny,I'm able to talk back.
2.I overcame the fear of being labelled as an ill-mannered person.Come to think of it,if they are so respectable,why would they want to be insulting??If they are so insulting,then they are not worth my respect.Agree?It's a fair deal,if they insult me,I talk back sarcastically.If they don't want to receive any insults from me,they shouldn't insult me.
3.The most IMPORTANT point.For a guy who has been inoffensive all his life...it's tough for him to become offensive.Because it's not in his blood.After deciding to put a stop to all these nonsense,I made it a point to learn from my experience.I'll share with you exactly how I did it.
Read on....
THE 6 SECRETS TO OVERCOMING INSULTS & SARCASM FROM IRRITATING PEOPLE
Secret 1:After every insult,ask yourself this question..."If I was given a chance to repeat the whole scenario again,what will I say to that bastard?"
This is quite an important step.As you learn,you become better.By doing this step,you train your mind up,to think and to respond faster.Trust me,during the first few times,you'll get whacked.But after sometime,you'll be good at reflecting sarcasm and insults.
Secret 2:Get opinions of different people on what they would do,if they were in your shoes.
This is another way to increase your creativity.I have some friends who are really good at being sarcastic.I would give them the scenario and ask them how they'll react.They usually provide me with a lot of ideas and creative ways of "reflective insulting".
Secret 3:NEVER GET ANGRY.
This is the MOST IMPORTANT SECRET.Don't ever get angry.If you get angry,your mind will stop thinking.No matter how intelligent of creative you are,you won't be able to perform.I know it's really difficult,especially after an insult,you are boiling inside.But no matter what,keep cool and calm.Then you can think clearly and hurl back the deadliest insult.
Secret 4:Know who is your opponent.
Now,before you fire,you must know who are you firing at.You don't want to fire at someone who has authority over you,and get into trouble.But based on my experience,usually those who have authority over me don't try all these nonsense on me.
Those that are insulting are usually those who have no authority over me.But at the same time,you must know whether they have backing.
Let me give an example...for my case,Dennis Trident(if you don't know who she is,read my previous entries) has no authority over me.But she has backing of the Pharoah,who has authority over me.So I have to be careful when attacking her.
Secret 5:Have the correct attitude.
You must have the correct attitude when firing back.The main objective is to stop them from trying their nonsense on you again.You don't have to tear their faces(unless of course they ask for it).Even if you lose,don't get angry.Just let it pass and learn from your experience.
Secret 6:Know your standpoint.
Yes,it's important to know where you stand.Don't fire off without thinking.Else you make a fool out of yourself.Importantly,are you in the wrong?Or are they just being nasty?If you are in the wrong,be a gentleman and acknowledge your mistakes.Apologise if necessary.(That's how I do it).But if you are not in the wrong,STAND UP FOR YOURSELF.NEVER BACK DOWN!!
Maintain your position at all times.Your enemies will cause you to fall into guilt,thereby causing you toback down.Don't fall for that.
They'll usually tell you that you should respect your elders no matter what.To me that's nonsense.
OK,let's talk about real life cases...you'll have fun learning about these....
Case 1:
This incident happended.My good friend Christopher was insulted by this bastard from his Poly.It was thru SMS.Let's call that guy W.Here's the conversation...
W:"Hey do you know that XXX who is a gay is looking for you?"
Chris was freaking mad when he received the SMS.I helped him to reply.Here's my reply...
"WHAT?!When did you become gay?Wah,still call me your friend.Such a big thing you didn't inform me.Did you ass break?Don't worry,tell me when you go for surgery,I'll visit you.Remember to SMS me your hospital,ward and bed number ok?"
W was freaking mad when he read my reply.Here's his reply...
W:"Cheebye Wee Kok Weng,say me gay!"
I replied again...
"Hahaha aren't you gay?So how does it feel to get fucked from behind?"
He never replied again.
Case 2:This happended during a Chinese New Year celebration.I forgot which year.But this bastard kept insulting my brother and I.For a few years we kept quiet.Until that time....
Bastard:"Wah,you are damn fat man.Hahaha,so fat,not scared must take IPPT meh?"
Marco:"Yes,I'm living such a good life.I'm rich and prosperous,have plenty to eat and don't need to take any IPPT.I work in air-con,don't need to go outfield.You jealous?"
He shut up immediately.God damn it,I didn't insult him or anything.He kept provoking me.In order to spice things up,I could have added this...
"If I give you face,I call you uncle.If I don't give you face,you are nothing but a dog.I never insulted you,why must you insult me?"(directly translated from cantonese)
Well,those are just 2 examples that I thought about.There are actually more.Ask Chris,he'll tell you how sarcastic I can me.But that's not the point.I used to be very innocent and get insulted without know what to do.
If you are like me last time,I feel for you.If you feel that I'm a rude jerk,then that's your opinion.Just throw away what you read.
But I still stand on what I said.If elders don't know how to earn our respect,we don't have to respect them.Being elders don't give them the fucking right to be insulting when we do nothing wrong.
Remember,stand up for yourself if you are not in the wrong!With that,I wish you a great year ahead.Hope that you'll be able to deflect insults.Just keep learning and gain experience.
Be Blessed.
Before I start,I want to wish you a happy new year.2007,it's the year of new beginnings.Hope that you have a wonderful year ahead.
Let's start now...
Have you ever been in this situation?...Someone that you didn't offend keeps trying to run you down with verbal attacks?You were the nice guy,you kept quiet and let the other person "slash" you verbally.
Probably you were at a loss of what to say?Or you were not sure whether you should talk back?Because that person that "attacked" you was someone of higher authority.
I don't know if you were through the same thing as me...But when I was younger,I used to experience a lot of insults from my relatives.Those 2nd aunt,third uncles....you know what I mean...especially during family gatherings.That's why I hated family gatherings.
Now,my usual approach was to keep quiet and not talk back.After all,as asians,our parents taught us that we must respect our elders.I beg to differ from that.My rule is this "RESPECT YOUR ELDERS ONLY IF THEY DESERVED TO BE RESPECTED!"
I may sound arrogant.But that's me.I believe that just by being our elders don't give them the right to be insulting towards us.Especially if we didn't do anything wrong or anything bad towards them.
You may or may not agree with me.But that's fine.
I got very tired of these nonsense.It happends everytime at gatherings.Best part is my parents join in sometimes.I used to go home feeling very hurt and frustrated.I felt helpless...
WHY?WHY MUST I KEEP GETTING "BULLIED"?CAN'T I STAND UP FOR MYSELF?
AT LAST...I got fed up with all these nonsense.I was determined to give these bastards a taste of their own medicine...
I figured out why I was at a loss when they insulted me.Few reasons...
1.I was not prepared.I didn't expect them to insult me.When it happends,my mind was blank,I was not able to respond to them.
2.Fear.Fear of being labelled as a "bad boy" with no manners.Dare not offend those idiotic elders.
3.Lack of experience.Don't know how to be sarcastic back.
Let me share with you how I overcame those 3 problems...
1.I realised that these bastards have a tendency to like to be insulting.So I prepare myself before every gathering.If they try to be funny,I'm able to talk back.
2.I overcame the fear of being labelled as an ill-mannered person.Come to think of it,if they are so respectable,why would they want to be insulting??If they are so insulting,then they are not worth my respect.Agree?It's a fair deal,if they insult me,I talk back sarcastically.If they don't want to receive any insults from me,they shouldn't insult me.
3.The most IMPORTANT point.For a guy who has been inoffensive all his life...it's tough for him to become offensive.Because it's not in his blood.After deciding to put a stop to all these nonsense,I made it a point to learn from my experience.I'll share with you exactly how I did it.
Read on....
THE 6 SECRETS TO OVERCOMING INSULTS & SARCASM FROM IRRITATING PEOPLE
Secret 1:After every insult,ask yourself this question..."If I was given a chance to repeat the whole scenario again,what will I say to that bastard?"
This is quite an important step.As you learn,you become better.By doing this step,you train your mind up,to think and to respond faster.Trust me,during the first few times,you'll get whacked.But after sometime,you'll be good at reflecting sarcasm and insults.
Secret 2:Get opinions of different people on what they would do,if they were in your shoes.
This is another way to increase your creativity.I have some friends who are really good at being sarcastic.I would give them the scenario and ask them how they'll react.They usually provide me with a lot of ideas and creative ways of "reflective insulting".
Secret 3:NEVER GET ANGRY.
This is the MOST IMPORTANT SECRET.Don't ever get angry.If you get angry,your mind will stop thinking.No matter how intelligent of creative you are,you won't be able to perform.I know it's really difficult,especially after an insult,you are boiling inside.But no matter what,keep cool and calm.Then you can think clearly and hurl back the deadliest insult.
Secret 4:Know who is your opponent.
Now,before you fire,you must know who are you firing at.You don't want to fire at someone who has authority over you,and get into trouble.But based on my experience,usually those who have authority over me don't try all these nonsense on me.
Those that are insulting are usually those who have no authority over me.But at the same time,you must know whether they have backing.
Let me give an example...for my case,Dennis Trident(if you don't know who she is,read my previous entries) has no authority over me.But she has backing of the Pharoah,who has authority over me.So I have to be careful when attacking her.
Secret 5:Have the correct attitude.
You must have the correct attitude when firing back.The main objective is to stop them from trying their nonsense on you again.You don't have to tear their faces(unless of course they ask for it).Even if you lose,don't get angry.Just let it pass and learn from your experience.
Secret 6:Know your standpoint.
Yes,it's important to know where you stand.Don't fire off without thinking.Else you make a fool out of yourself.Importantly,are you in the wrong?Or are they just being nasty?If you are in the wrong,be a gentleman and acknowledge your mistakes.Apologise if necessary.(That's how I do it).But if you are not in the wrong,STAND UP FOR YOURSELF.NEVER BACK DOWN!!
Maintain your position at all times.Your enemies will cause you to fall into guilt,thereby causing you toback down.Don't fall for that.
They'll usually tell you that you should respect your elders no matter what.To me that's nonsense.
OK,let's talk about real life cases...you'll have fun learning about these....
Case 1:
This incident happended.My good friend Christopher was insulted by this bastard from his Poly.It was thru SMS.Let's call that guy W.Here's the conversation...
W:"Hey do you know that XXX who is a gay is looking for you?"
Chris was freaking mad when he received the SMS.I helped him to reply.Here's my reply...
"WHAT?!When did you become gay?Wah,still call me your friend.Such a big thing you didn't inform me.Did you ass break?Don't worry,tell me when you go for surgery,I'll visit you.Remember to SMS me your hospital,ward and bed number ok?"
W was freaking mad when he read my reply.Here's his reply...
W:"Cheebye Wee Kok Weng,say me gay!"
I replied again...
"Hahaha aren't you gay?So how does it feel to get fucked from behind?"
He never replied again.
Case 2:This happended during a Chinese New Year celebration.I forgot which year.But this bastard kept insulting my brother and I.For a few years we kept quiet.Until that time....
Bastard:"Wah,you are damn fat man.Hahaha,so fat,not scared must take IPPT meh?"
Marco:"Yes,I'm living such a good life.I'm rich and prosperous,have plenty to eat and don't need to take any IPPT.I work in air-con,don't need to go outfield.You jealous?"
He shut up immediately.God damn it,I didn't insult him or anything.He kept provoking me.In order to spice things up,I could have added this...
"If I give you face,I call you uncle.If I don't give you face,you are nothing but a dog.I never insulted you,why must you insult me?"(directly translated from cantonese)
Well,those are just 2 examples that I thought about.There are actually more.Ask Chris,he'll tell you how sarcastic I can me.But that's not the point.I used to be very innocent and get insulted without know what to do.
If you are like me last time,I feel for you.If you feel that I'm a rude jerk,then that's your opinion.Just throw away what you read.
But I still stand on what I said.If elders don't know how to earn our respect,we don't have to respect them.Being elders don't give them the fucking right to be insulting when we do nothing wrong.
Remember,stand up for yourself if you are not in the wrong!With that,I wish you a great year ahead.Hope that you'll be able to deflect insults.Just keep learning and gain experience.
Be Blessed.
posted by Marco at 8:31 AM
1 Comments:
Haix brother, I just dunno sometimes, why the world tends to step on you when you are sway and people around you kept laughing at you. Is it really wrong? why must people see people very sway and they are very * 10 power of 10 . but when you have something which they dun have or richer than them and they get very mad and jealous and tends to backstab you and sabotage until you lost everything and they will be so happy.???? after a year in christianity I haven't walk out of this truth. soemtimes I wish there was a punisher to punish those people. to teach thema lesson.
like from ur post, people keep stepping on ur head while you have done them no wrong and never disturb them , why people must carry swords and kill people , why must people create wars? must men really wait till the end of days will they ever wake up and repent.
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